Rooftop Report

Getting his ass handed to him

Well Aaron Gleeman just ripped Bill Plaschke of the Los Angeles Times a new asshole. After reading Plaschke's most recent article on Paul DePodesta, I can't blame him. Actually, I think he probably took it easy on him, failing to jump on such ridiculous quotes as:

"And nothing against DePodesta, but it's hard to watch what was once baseball's most prestigious operation become an entry-level position."

"Given the abundance of certain names on the Internet these days, I guess the Dodgers should be fortunate their new general manager isn't Paris Hilton."

His article seems to miss on every journalistic point possible; save grammar. It is not funny, it is factually inaccurate, it is very misleading, and it's only interesting factor is how open it is to criticism.

Aaron, great job.

Cubs Page

Will someone sign Maddux before the All-Star break?

Another day, another certain free agent pitcher from Atlanta still not signed. A-Rod went through 3 different rounds of fortnight long trade talks, with two teams, all with a $20 million a year salary hanging over him, and even he has settled down before Maddux. I mean, we are talking about a 37 year old pitcher who had an ERA perilously close to 4.00 last year, right?

Yes, that subtle rip on G.M. is bitterness... I admit it. I have this feeling in my stomach though that because the Dodgers have just finalized the sale of their team, and subsequently hired the uber-talented Paul DePodesta, they will want to make a splash - - and soon. That splash may come in the form of signing Maddux and then trading Odalis Perez to the Dodgers for Magglio Ordonez. A violent water movement like that will hurt the Cubs for two reasons, (1) No Maddux (2) We play the Dodgers six times next year.

Either way, I am definitely at the point where I want to know what is going to happen; if not only for the fear of bitterness taking over every aspect of my life. I can't keep getting mad at everbody else for being indesicive just because Maddux won't make up his mind. Seriously, my girlfriend is tired of being snapped at for not picking a restaurant fast enough.

Update: I was just reading the Cub Reporter and realized our Maddux posts are ridiculously similar. Sorry about that, didn't mean to steal...great minds think a like I guess. Anyway, if you came here first, which I doubt, check it out.

All you could ever want on the A-Rod Deal

Now that the A-Rod deal is only pending the commisioners approval, I am ready to send you down the road of statistical analysis:

Alex Cieply over at Ball Talk does a great job breaking down the trade using VORP.

ESPN.com goes over the Yankees new projected lineup by cost per 9 innings. Suffice it to say I wouldn't mind making the same about in a year.

Alex Belth at Bronx Banter talks about the money involved in the trade as well as giving numerous links to news reports on the trade.

All while The Bambino's Curse tries to judge the reaction of Red Sox Nation.

Also, on a note that doesn't have much to do with baseball, but yet I found funny, in the ESPN.com article referenced above there is a quote from President Bush stating:

"I was just as surprised as the Yankee fans and the Boston Red Sox fans when I opened up my paper today..."

"It, obviously, is a big deal. ... A-Rod's a great player and the Yanks are going to be a heck of a team with him in the infield."

I thought the president said he didn't read the paper.

Rooftop Wrap-Up - - Weekend Edition

Since I won't be posting on the weekend I will do you the distinct favor of breaking out your weekend of reading. Now some of you may be tempted to skip ahead and read everything in one sitting, I would recommend you not do that. I mean, when you do that at dinner you always end up with a sick stomach... don't you?

For anytime:

If you are a Cubs fan and want to see the advantges to having Walker and Grudz platoon, check this article by Rob Neyer out; it is pretty interesting .

Well, it looks like Bush finally released all his military records. Or, I mean, maybe... This story is pretty convoluted and is amazingly "he said..she said." That being said, the banter between White House reporters and McClellan is becoming downright hilarious. Read further down the article to get to the even funnier stuff.

Jessica Simpson is going to be staring in a new sitcom on ABC. How's this for a stretch? She is playing a fictional character named Jessica Sampson.

Bill Mahr has an interesting post up on his blogger about the readiness of our troops in Iraq. Sometimes I wonder if all this talk of being under armed is really true. Not because I don't believe Bill Mahr, or ABC, but because it is one of those things that, as Americans, you just don't think is possible. It is very hard for me to comprehend that our Army, THE ARMY, doesn't have enough bullet proof vests and goggles to go around. If it is true...man, I'll dig into the national debt some more to get these guys some gear. Eh, what am I talking about, let's just cut taxes again.

Armor from home [ABC News]

Saturday:

Mel Gibson tries for the worst Valentine's Day Gift ever - - eternal suffering? This is just not good business... Even if you did play Martin Riggs.

Mel Gibson interview [MSNBC]

A new epidemic is taking over the nation, and it has nothing to do with birds, cows, or Asia. Try to take care of this before going to bed on this sacredest of Hallmark Holidays.

I've always been told not to let them bite [Yahoo]

For Becky (not that she reads this... too much "sportsy" and "politicy" stuff):

"Out of the tree of life, I just picked me a plum
You came along and everything started to hum
Still it's a real good bet, the best is yet to come

The best is yet to come, and won't that be fine
You think you've seen the sun, but you ain't seen it shine"

Sunday:

Check out the Wisconsin Democratic Debate on MSNBC. Then check out the reaction.

Edwards schedule shows the debate [JohnEdwards2004]
Aftermath of the debate [NYtimes]

Relax and watch chaos ensue. Oh, god Vanilla, put it away.

Nudist camp goes Surreal [WB/Yahoo]

If that isn't your flavor (get it, Vanilla...oh, shut up) check out the best movie EVER.

"Truth, you want the truth?" [TBS/Yahoo]

Have a good weekend all.

Spring Training Invitees

The Transaction Guy comes through in the clutch again with his full list of spring training invitees. If this doesn't keep you busy for a while then I don't know what will.

I love looking at these lists for the humor value alone. Some goodies:

Garth Brooks - - Kansas City. Yes, THE Garth Brooks, the 42 year old country star. Carlos Beltran better start looking over his shoulder because Garth has stored up some Unanswered Prayers. Ouch...that was a painfully bad joke.

The Devil Rays and their - - "we all used to be heavily overpaid" list:

Todd Ritchie
Fred McGriff
Mike Williams
Fernando Tatis
Devi Cruz

In 2001 this group of 5 made: $15,900,000
In 2002: $17,900,000
In 2003: $15,900,000
Total last three years: $49,700,000

For the following:

26 wins
49 losses
96 saves
4.83 ERA

121 HR
490 RBI
13 SB
.259 BA

Sex, sex, sex... and steroids

Well, it looks like this John Kerry sex scandal might have some staying power. Great! (he says sarcastically) If this actually continues, I pray that Kerry isn't the nominee because, I really don't want to hear about this for another 8 months.

Funny quote from the Washington Post [via Obernews]:

"I don't think I could have coped so well" with a mate's philandering as Sen. Hillary Rodham Clinton (D-N.Y.) has. "I used to say to my husband, my late husband, 'If you ever get something I'll maim you. Not kill you, just maim you.' And we'd laugh, laugh, laugh." Heinz adds that she has never had any reason to suspect either of her husbands. "Not for one day, because what I expect of them, they have a right to expect of me. Maybe I'm into 18-year-olds."

You can read the full article here.

Yowsers!

On a lighter note, the Hottest Female Competition at ESPN has been whittled down to the four finalists + Jennie Finch (apparently the winner from last year). Anyway, here you go [Hottest Female Athlete]

Okay, is it just me, or is talking about steroids the new black? I mean, I don't care about this until they nail an actual athlete. Oooh, Bonds trainer is in trouble, quick alert the foreign embassy. Can't they use this space to talk about the Cubs getting more night games? I am sure the Uncouth Sloth will agree.

I know I promised three sexes, but I just don't have the time right now. Maybe later baby.

This and That...

I think, even though I have only posted 9 times now, that I am on the record as caring about pretty much only 2 things; women and baseball. Let me make a little comparison for you:

If you like women you are stupid not to check out the new ESPN Hottest Female Athlete Contest. Yes, it demeans women. Especially because everyone of them could beat me in any athletic endeavor (even though I am of an athletic build). So, that is the negative. The positive is.... phew, just check it out.

In case you were wondering I voted for, Tara Dakides, Logan Tom, Anna Kournikova, and Jamie Sale. If you have any problems with that feel free to let me know.

Hottest Female Athlete Group 1
Hottest Female Athlete Group 2
Hottest Female Athlete Group 3
Hottest Female Athlete Group 4

Okay, are you back? Now, here is the comparison; those group of ladies are to hot women as Baseball Prospectus is to baseball knowledge. If you don't have a subscription to it, well, then I pity you. Here is what I suggest, skip the Wendy's lunch for the next couple of days and instead go sign up. You will thank me, and all of the writers, very shortly after doing so.

Oh, yeah, don't forget to tell them that it was this impassioned pleah that got you to join.

[Update:] This post can now be viewed here.